pouring my heart out for noone to listen..

hey, you,.. chances are you won't read this .. so why mention your name. I just wanted to say.. I've known you for sometime now.. and everything just kinda jumble together still every time i see you. There may have been that time where you might have thought... but you don't have a clue how i really feel about you..
really theres not much thats going to change.. because I;m not just going to throw myself out there...because theres a her..

Theres a part of me that just wants to move on.. I really do.. because this is one of those things.. where I really am just dreaming... I've never gotten my hopes up when it comes to you and i really dont plan on it.
Do you notice.. how when i talk to you I still look away??...
part of me feels like you think I'm foolish.. and just a child.. and almost as if you talk down to me .. but not really...
part of me feels like im just overreacting about everything.. like always.. but

Yeah i feel like i should be able to talk to you by now.. but I can't.. I don't know why.. I get really nervous and start to stutter and i feel like a complete fool. because I'm afraid what I am thinking in my head might actually come out in conversation..

I wish i could just sit you down.. for a day.. somewhere.. and just talk... about everything.. but I want you to respond the way I want you too.. and thats is why when i think about you .. its just me dreaming.. wishing for what I can not have.

sometimes i really feel like I've moved on.. but then.. I see you and it all comes back.. Its a fricken curse..and since day one.. I've been wishing for this mindless crush to end..


so if by chance you read this... some way.. some how.. Hello.. I'm here and you're obviously on my mind.

xoxO
  G

He's a vegetarian..

*Droolllsss*

OMG..

REAL HOUSEWIVES OF NEW JERSEY REUNION TONIGHT!!! =]!! SCORE!

<3

MMMMmmm Hugh Jackman!!

Gretchen: I wish I could buy him at Shaws

Me: OMG…. Me2… GaHh

Gretchen: Which Aisle would he be in?

Me: Aisle number Sexy :)

Gretchen: Haha Aisle Sexy Beast…

Me: OMG.. Clothing Optional... Old man Rogers included ;)

Gretchen: ahahhah.. Dirty!  

lmaooo :D Just 2 people that make me suuupper happy! 

Permission To Speak Freely, SIr.

Not knowing how much time you can waste,
logic seems to be a mistake.
Have you ever tried to look at yourself upside round?
how come you always end up facedown? 

"I went to the woods because I wanted to live deliberately. I wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life."

This movie, Dead Poets Society, is one of my favorite movies. Robin Williams is amazing in it. But the movie is sooo powerful. I love all the amazing quotes in it.. and everytime I watch this movie, I always.. ALWAYS.. go on this big poetry kick. I’ve always loved poetry wither i am reading it or I am writing it. I also love Shakespeare. lately because I am taking a Shakespeare class and i have this huge book.. i just go through his poems and read sections of them. 

I remember In 8th grade, our english class was based on poetry. We needed like 25 poems a quarter. My teacher would always have me read mine to the class. I adored my poems I’d love writing them.. I had this one poem, that was probably 10 parts. 

I wish I could go onto my old student account at the high school and email myself all of the poems that i have saved on there. The other day I was looking at some old Myspace stuff thats only from 3 years ago.. and it was such a huge change.. I would like to see what i was writing about 5 or 6 years ago. 

I think in my spare time I’m going to start writing again. I miss it. 

maybe I’ll post some.. and maybe they will be just as awesome as my 500 Post  poem…. If you havn’t read it.. I advise you go find it on my page =D!

xOxO

  G

today was kinda crappy..w

well the second half of it sucked..

but what makes it all better.. is hearing cheeno bark... and realizing he is on my bed barking because he would like me to go to bed now..
at least someone cares..


NIGHTWORLD....

Well I was reading the news paper.

Don’t be too shocked… It was behind the Funnys…. =P

It was in the Lifebeat section, i think it was yesterdays paper too. Its tited Core Values. wich caught my eye, for some strange reason. 

It was about this girl who went to a YMCA healthy living convention and they did a little game called Healthy Values. Where the proctor passed out a list of 20 something words like love, family, money, ETC. They then passed the paper around writing down 2 other words that are considered values. wach person would take a paper that had the whole list of words and they were to shorten it down from about 75 to 3. those three are their core values. 

So Obviously got me thinking about what my core values are…. wich honestly I’ve never thought of. 

So, because I am not in a group of people, I looked up a list of core values. Its a pretty chunky list too. 

After I narrowed it down to only 3.. wich was very difficult. It came down to, Optimism, Creativity, and Hard Work. 

There were others that i was stuck on, like change and tolerance. However i decided those three words are the bases for the other words i was stuck on. 

Optimism: Even though times are tough, I don’t see why its impossible for things to change. I think the only way things are actually going to change for the better, is if we beleive they will. I know that sounds very Disney/Cliche, but its true. If i were to walk around everywhere thinking like Eeyore , i would get nothing done. I probably go into some sort of depression. 

Creativity: WHy does life have to be so, in the box? I can’t do something if its boring. Theres no point in doing it. ITs also not hard to think of ways to make it fun. For me creativity is a must. by working with girl scouts, I’ve learned people don’t wanna do stuff if it doesnt interest them. so if you just put a weird spin on it.. its not so bad. 

Hard Work: With the fun comes hard work. I am a very determined person, along with someone who like to get things done.  I don’t think i can accomplish much by being lazy. So this one is pretty simple. if i want change, or to make a difference I have to put in hard work. 

So one simple question.. What are your Core Values?!

xOxO

  G

I adore this weather...

Its 63 degrees in August. Its almost like a dream come true. I love cold weather. I find it quite delightful. I get to wear sweaters and jeans. I wear sweatshirts 3 out of the 4 seasons in the year. they are almost a security blanket.I feel naked without one. not to mention how soft and comfy they are. I  have a ton of sweatshirts but theres one i wear alllll the time. It is my flobots sweatshirt. I got it in august of 2008 and it is torn to shreads. the bottom of it is all like ripped theres holes in the sleeves. I need to sew it, but I honestly don’t know how to sew. It never works. I got  a new flobots sweatshirt its close to the same thing, but the other one is just sooo comfy, and warn in.

another thing I like to do in this rainy cold weather, wear the sweatshirts and jeans but go barefoot with my dog. everything is softer when its raining and it just feels so nice. =]

not to change the subject and to fall into the gutter. Gerard Butler is on the tv…. NOMNOMNOMNOM… 

=] 

I loveee his voice.. that Irish Accent is just heaven.. 

It makes me want to go back to Ireland.. but I’m saving for Italy.. ;P

hmmm… 

well Today has started off a pretty good day if i don’t say.. Lovely weather and Gerard Butler.. =] 

=] 

xOxo 

  G

CAnvas Print Numero Dos!

I actually have a 3rd one but its of Cheeno and I gave it too my sister cause shes gonna put it in her dorm.

I can tell fall is coming

I've already ate wayy to many peaches from the orchard.. <3

Obama's Personal Faith Leaves Public Wondering.

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA…. AHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA…. 

AHAHAHAHAH.. 

Does it reallly matter?!?!?!?!?!?! 

if there is a separation between church and state.. Why wonder?! It shouldn’t make a difference.  

SO PLEASE JUST SHUT UP! 

Thanks. 

Okay, this is just disgusting..

So Egg Suppliers are being recalled for salmonella.. but its not the first time. 

and its not the first time this has happened.. OBVIOUSLY…

People can get severely ill from salmonella.. 

Why do we let these buisnesses stay in buisness.. after the 4 penalty?

Take A Look AT These! 

—In 1994, the state of Iowa assessed at least four separate penalties against DeCoster Farms for environmental violations, many of them involving hog waste.

—In 1997, DeCoster Egg Farms agreed to pay $2 million in fines to settle citations brought in 1996 for health and safety violations at DeCoster’s farm in Turner, Maine. The nation’s labor secretary at the time, Robert Reich, said conditions were “as dangerous and oppressive as any sweatshop.” Reich’s successor, Alexis Herman, called the state of the farms “simply atrocious,” citing unguarded machinery, electrical hazards, exposure to harmful bacteria and other unsanitary conditions.

—In 2000, Iowa designated DeCoster a “habitual violator” of environmental regulations for problems that included hog manure runoff into waterways. The label made him subject to increased penalties and prohibited him from building new farms.

—In 2002, the federal Equal Employment Opportunity Commission announced a more than $1.5 million settlement of an employment discrimination lawsuit against DeCoster Farms on behalf of Mexican women who reported they were subjected to sexual harassment, including rape, abuse and retaliation by some supervisory workers at DeCoster’s Wright County plants.

—In 2007, 51 workers were arrested during an immigration raid at six DeCoster egg farms. His farms had been the subject of at least three previous raids.

—In June 2010, Maine Contract Farming, the successor company to DeCoster Egg Farms, agreed in state court to pay $25,000 in penalties and to make a one-time payment of $100,000 to the Maine Department of Agriculture over animal cruelty allegations that were spurred by a hidden-camera investigation by an animal welfare organization.

Don’t you find that upsetting?!
But thats not the only upsetting thing!.. . I mean Should I even get into how this company treats their chickens?! 
Thats disgusting also..I recommend.. people to start paying maybe 50cents more for the humane certified eggs.They arn’t hard to find! 

The ongoing reports of vicious behavior to factory raised animals, chickens that live an intolerable life to begin with, is unacceptable.

This is something I really feel strongly about..maybe you should look into it. 

This website im going to post is just a very quick read.. and please read it. 

http://www.wspa-international.org/wspaswork/factoryfarming/default.aspx

.. 

Your choices are your own..

but maybe you should try to make ones that will benefit the health and wellness of other things on and around this planet.

xOxO

  G

so i started a 1000 piece puzzle..

AT 10:30.. I didnt finish the border... untill 12:30

It wouldn't have taken me soo long if i didnt loose 3 pieces... and have to search through 950 pieces of puzzle to find these 3 pieces...
an then i found the last one undeer the table... after i went a little crazy.
I stopped at 1
because if i didnt  I wouldnt have gone to bed.
so now I lay.. in my bed.... w my dog... thinking about this damn puzzel...

XoXo
  G

ITs 2:24

AM... 

Hmmmmmm 

HMmmmmm

HMMmmmm

HMMMmmm

HMMMMmm

HMMMMMm

HMMMMMM

WHy am i still up?

I made dinner tonight..

only because I needed to get out of the house.. so I had to go shopping..

*Baked Zucchini strips
* Mini Zucchini pizzas
*Quinoa sautée
*Marinara sauce..

MY HANDS SMELL LIKE GARLIC!!! >.<

I FINNNALLY got around to doing this.. :D

My Canvas print that i made out of a picture ( i think i posted the actual picture a few days ago) that i took while i was in Penn. State.. Its obviously of a cow.. ITs in black and white because I have no color ink left . >.< but this was actually just a trial run and i think it worked out reallly well.. I need to get like a sealant spray.. or idk what its called.. (arts and crafts, was never my forte!)


the funny part about me making this was when i went to use the iron... (this proves that one day i will be on the real housewives show, probably D.C)  I actually couldnt figure out how to get the ironing board down.. its like attached to the wall and the iron is behind it.. and then i couldnt get the iron on.. I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THAT WE HAD GOTTEN A NEW IRON! wich made it all worse.. i  was like oh this one has pictures on it .. it should be easy... WTH !!! HOW AM I SUPPOSE TO FIGURE OUT WICH ONE IS COTTON!?!?

then .. the most embarrasing part.. i was waiting ... and i touched the hot thingy ... aand it wasn't hot...

I didnt plug the iron in...

then i waited another 5 mins.. it still wasnt hot...


to get the iron to work you have to turn like some timer.... I guess its a safty thing if you forget to unplug the iron it shuts it off automatically..

well after about 30 mins.. or what should have only taken 10.. I finnally finished..
and its quite perfect... =]]]

well that was my excitment for the day.. i think im gonna make dinner today.. only because i need to get out of this house so if i make this dinner.. i can go shopping. =D!


WHAT TO MAKE!?!?!?

xOxO
  G

I need to work on my posture...

even right now im slouching...
its starting to hurt my back.

Its a bad habit you pick up  during US History II and Math classes...

=P

xOXO
   G

I'm sorry but,

The greatest enemy to human souls is the self-righteous spirit which makes men look to themselves for salvation. 




I'm Through... I mean yeah only 9 days left.. but I'm not too sure i can deal with those 9 days... its soo peacefulll when your away.

You point out everyone's flaw and put yourself on a pedestal.  someplace you shouldn't.  You think your better than everyone eles and wonder why you get no respect. why should someone show respect to someone who doesn't respect them?

Maybe we'd actually get along.. if you didn't talk down to me for once...

but i guess thats something thats going to stay a dream...



So farewell...

OMG HOW COULD I FORGETT!!!!

During the 8 hours of standing in line i did mine, my sisters, and her boyfriends makup..

=]

SO the Adam Lambert Concert... =P

Can You say.. Gay Burlesque Musical?

or simply.. HEaven!!!

I waited outside lupos for 8&1/2 hours and i wasn't even close to being 1st in line. there were people who had camped out from the

night before. Thankfully.. I know how to work

lupos and because it was a bunch of moms and teenniegirlyfans.. I can

easily push myself pretty much onto the bar.. there was like 1 person infront of me.. but it was the perfect spot.

<---Allison Irehita .. ok thats deffinitlay not how you spell her last name but I'm not looking it up..

She was also on american idol ... BUT she was abosolutly amazing herself!!! =] and I absolutly adored her HAir.. >

NOW! .. FOR THE BEST PART OF THE NIGHT..

the man that looked like he took a bath in glitter....

... ok so i really wasn't too sure what too expect. Sooo... I was super impressed. :P

HE came out in like this carnivali

sh outfit..----------->

the stage setup was, everything was pushed back.. so there was this big open stage and then there was a little stage that probably stoood 3 feet off the ground and there were these big metal

steps going up to the stage..

Now lupos is a pretty small stage.. I have never seen it look so spacy. Its amazing!

HE had 4 dancers, they were soo cool and realllllyreallly good.. like I could have stood there and had him sing in the background with the dancers dancing the whole night and i would have been content.

But I'm glad that didn't happen.

The second song he sang.. wich made me sooo happy.. was Ring Of Fire by Johnny Cash.. IT was probably the best performance he had when he was on american idol. I absoulty adore this mans voice.. it is probably a mix between, Johnny Cash, Michael Jackson, Elvis Presley and something eles amazing in there.

The show was sold out.. so everyone was packed in like sardines... but i still found the room to dance.. because thats what you do to his music.. and when it comes to concerts.. i really dont care who I'm touching..

Adam Lambert has a guitarist named Tommy.. =] HE is the cutest thing eveRR!!!! at first, to some people, he may look a little scary.. but when he actually picks his head up.. OMG!! he looks like a wittle shaggypuppyy..

and i'm deffenitly not gonna complain when him and adam decide

to makeout :P

yes i give you permission to marvel at my amazing photography... Its comes naturally to me.. especially in a sold out crowd of screaming jumping fans..

So I'm going to wrapp this up so i can go clean my room and take a shower cause i smell.During the concert there was this cute gay guy next to me who looked like he was going to cry the whole time.. it was adorable. So at the end of the show adam went off... an then he came back on for an encore.. and he did 2 more songs wich were amazing.. but at the end of the second one.. he went to this girl in to front who was like decked out in glittter and she looked amazing.. and just started like making out with her.. and then continued singing... and then.. the gay guy next to me was like jumping up and down singing.. and adam walked over and pointed to him... and moved some people out of the way.. and started making out w him.. The guy was just in shock... like his boyfriend was like you just made out with adam lambert.. and he like couldn't talk. IT was hilarious.. I could not stop laughing... :P

I wouldn't say this concert was "Hardcore" but it was Eccentric and probably one of the most entertaining shows i have ever been too.

So know i shall post some of my amazing pphotography and then end this little story. :P

xOxO

G

LOVELOVELOVEE

bored in a hotel..

I kinda love this picture. Its about a month old, me and my cousin were chillin' in our hotel in Pennsylvania, and besides the ice fight we were bored..

I Dont think it worked..

Dang... My tumblr feeds to my facebook AND twitter.. like come on wth... )=

I need to stop being so stupid!

UGH! ...
I cant figure this out!
I'm trying to get my tumblr to feed to my blogger account so I dont have to type out the blogs 2x and i can just type into one and it posts to both but this is really confusing.. IT really shouldn't be and i think i havnt slept much and that may be why... but ugh.. ILL GET IT!!! ... Someday.. =P

I love when simple things make me smile..

So lately I’ve been kind of down in the dumps… mostly from exhaustion..

and days like today I decide to look at my horoscopes… I really don’t fully beleive in them. because they are never 100% correct. so I usally don’t focus on them..

Sometimes, like today, they tend to make me feel better…

According to Astrology.com their daily libra quickie is..

Have faith in yourself. If you imagine you can do it, it’s already nearly done.

and so know I dont feel as useless as before..

Thank you, Astrology.com and your horoscope authors!

xOxO

G

Dancing Queen?

As of right now I am sitting in my sisters eye doctor waiting room. We are 30mins late and it’s because we drove around looking for a parking spot. The building is in the middle of the city so their parking lot consists of 5 spaces. We finnally find one and we get into the office. There are 3 other people in the waiting room with me. A really old guy reading his paper, a kid who can’t remember what kind of contacts he wears an a mentally challenged guy who came to his appointment an hour early. Once everything settled down, off into the distance I hear dancing queen on the office radio. The radio is barely on, the volume is so low I think a dog might have trouble hearing. But for some reason it brings a sense of calmness to all these waiting people. This may not make sence but it really does. Once something disturbs the music the people around me start to fidget. The guy who can’t remember anything starts tapping his foot obsessively and the mentally challenge man starts talking and moving around. Even I start to get antsy. I start looking around at things like a paranoid schitzophrenic. But then the commotion settles again and the kid starts trying to remember why he only has one contact in again and the lady next to me starts reading over my shoulder again. Its kind of like magic. I would love to sit and watch from above people in waiting rooms and how they react to different types of music and the volumes it is played at. I think I would b quite amused. But as for now I shall sit and let Rocket Man serenade me and my fellow waiters who suffer from Autistic Nervosa.

XoXo

G

So whos gonna let me plan their wedding?!

I realllyyy want to! like now... =]

HAve you noticed how happy flowers make me ? =]]]

my sister is chasing the mail lady.... >.<

The most important thing that i have learned in the past month.

Life is short, you don't quite know when it its going to end. even if you don't want to think about the end, its always in the back of your mind. you only have one chance at it, so you have to make the best out of it. theres a time and place for everything, and if you are breathing right now, this is your time and place, be the change you want to be in the world and don't let anyone tell you, that you are not good enough to do what you want. If your shot down once, try, try again. Noone is going to give you what you want, so you have to work for it and the harder you work the better its goings to be. If you get scared, step back, take a deep breathe and look at what your doing. Sometimes just slowing down and actually taking in what you've done and are in the process of completing is a good way to put one's mind at ease and reassure them that what they are doing is right and what they want. so Pretty much just make the best out of everything you do, because your gonna hate yourself later on if you dont.

XoxO

G

The John Mayer Concert Got Me Thinking.

About boys... Obviously.

Probably because John Mayer has the most gorgeous arms ever and arms are one of my weakness.

ok thats not the reason. =]

So I always thought I knew what kind of guy I wanted and just couldn't find it..

Welll, I was right about one thing, wrong about another.

John Mayer got me thinking about what kinda of guy i really want, wich compared to before was wrong. BUT I was right about the, couldn't find it. Because I'm not sure I'm never going to find the guy that fits these needs.

This is going to sound weird/confusing/crazy, but here me out.

I want the guy, with the stoner attitude, but without having to do the drugs to get there. I need that laid backness, But i dont want the stupidity.

I want a guy who kinda just wants to chill, one that will go to concerts like Dave Matthew's band, John Mayer or jack Johnsons and just wants to grove. but still rock out to like heavy metal concerts every once and a while. I want someone who just wants to spend their days in a field playing me the guitar and then falling asleep under the stars, but still wants something out of life and isn't just a bum.

Realistic thinking, huh?

Okay, I am quite picky.. but its just so I'm happy. I don't need drama or stupidness, so I'm going to picky and eventually get what I want.

But besides boys, The John Mayer/ Train concert was absolutely amazing. I'm so glad I got free tickets to go,(only bcause i wouldnt have paid money for seats as far away as what I had,pickyness again). I made the best out of the fact that I couldnt see, by dancing the whole night and looking at john mayers arms in the screen thingy. =]

Oh and I got a high 5 from the Lead singer of train, becasue I'm cool, like that. =]]

MAybe ill post some of the crappy pictures I took,

but I most likely won't

xoxO

G

AHH NEw CRUSH!

Ahh his face makes me squeal..!! =P ok im not that pathetic... So on my flight to ireland.. I watched 500 Days of Summer.. I had a little crush on him while watchign the movie but then forgot about him in all of Ireland's irishness.. but now becasue inception is such a big hit, I cant help but see him everywhere.. so now my little crush is becoming a big one.. Because hes soo fricken cute.. =DD!!

well I'm going to go, waste some time looking up pictures of this pretty boy and probably hugh jackman...

xOOOOOOOXXOOOOO

G

I'm afraid to make a comment about the oil spill

because last time they stopped the leak... I made a comment and then like 2 hours late it started leaking again..

but this is how i feel

=]]

and that will be all I say.

xOxO

G

I love old people.

Well I love Old Retired people. =P they have time to make awesome things like this Lemonade can airplane.. Its my my cousins, grandparents house. I love looking at it. Their grandfather makes the coolest things. I guess he does alot of wood working. I think he made our old paper plate holder. I'm not to sure though. :)

So I can barely sew, and I've tried to learn how to crochet. I really don't have the patience. I think the only thing i have the patience for is to do Jigsaw puzzles.

Thats what I'm going to do when I get old and retire some day.. Huge Jigsaw puzzles.. I make wallpaper out of them =P

Well I have a feeling if i try to do that it will end up becoming my life and that doesn't sound too exciting..

I guess i have some time to think about it.

xOOx

G

Something that really grosses me out..

Listening to people chew.

It skeeves me out..

I know this is really weird to talk about but i absolutely can’t stand it.

well, most people don’t really like listening to other chew… but when I tend to pick up everything… and it grosses me out sooo much.

I also understand its not always that possible to not chew loudly but ugh.

even though there are those awful people that I see chewing obnoxiously and disgustingly.. and its just like WHY?!

Why must you be soo yucky and ewwyyy..

I’m starting to sound really childish and rantish.. Its just YUCK..

So if your around me … I won’t point out how your chewing because my mind is really anal about it and i would feel bad if i was like NO… You NO CHEW!

but just try, and be aware i hear you chewing and I probably don;t liek it

=P

xOxO

G

Even the not-so perfect, can still be absolutely beautiful

I absolutely adore this flower. I found it at my cousins birthday party and it just made me so happy,(surprised?). I love when things arn't they way they are suppose to be but still are amazingly gorgeous. =]]

xOxO

G

So, these are some tomatoes that my stepdad brought home from the green house..

Hmmm.. I have a feeling we are going to be getting alot of these.. =]]

Ladida..

So, I'm probably going to say the same things on here as I do on my tumblr..

http://hellotheregianna.tumblr.com/

So If you read both... sorry... =P